first date

This weekend I went on my first idate.

In the slew of emails I got when I first signed up (like 5 or something in one day, which was a lot I learned - maybe not for everyone), I chose the one I liked the most. He wasn't particularly good looking, but not bad either. He looked nice. And while balding isn't always the hottest, it usually doesn't bother me.

I decided I could only deal with one interest at a time, since as we started emailing, it started sucking up hours of my time every day. Every nuance has to be just right, you know? Then we chatted on the phone. And I could tell then that it probably wasn't going to work out. He was overly geeky for me. He clearly liked having and showing off his wealth of trivia... on boring subjects. And he had the geek laugh. But who am I to judge? I can be geeky. So I gave him the benefit of the doubt. And we went on a date.

[This is where it gets hard - if I say too much, and he finds this site, he'll know its him and i don't want to hurt his feelings... right? Or does it matter?] Anyway, few details about what we actually did on the date. But lets just say I knew within 2 minutes that he wasn't for me. The balding sweet face had a rather large belly attatched to it, in addition to some serious style issues. I can overlook a lot of things, but the full combo wasn't going to work for me. And just so you don't think I'm a total bitch, really, looks aren't that important to me. Honestly. I accept a wide variety. Just not him.

Plus there was the geek factor. Now, I do this thing when I can tell someone is interested in me and I'm not interested in them. It must have some seriously messed up manipulative roots. But anyway, this side of my personality dominates that is charming and witty and smart and flirtatious. Like, all of a sudden because I'm not into them and they are into me, I am able to show that side (which I can't so easily to those I am attracted to). Not only do I show the side, but it comes out strong. Like I want to torture these poor souls, whose opinion of me must go up during these exchanges, as I totally mess with their emotions.

So, I come across as great. And I'm flirting, and sending signals that hey, she might be into me. Even though I'm not. So, at the end of the date, he goes in for the kiss, and I have to dodge to the cheek. And then of course the follow-up email, "lets do it again," that I had to reply to. That is seriously hard. Not emotionally, but just - what do you write? There should be a form letter out there. I'm sure people have their own forms, in fact.

Hi, total stranger who is now into me, maybe. I'm not into you. Have a nice life.

quality quotes

I'm not quite up to sharing entire emails, but here are some quality quotes I've saved (some of the best are sadly deleted... "best" being best-to-laugh-at, which is why they've been deleted).

"You appear to be pretty nifty."
"Is that the smell we are talking abt here? lol" (and then he went on to list a bunch of companies related to my field of interest... It was very weird and very icky. And totally confusing what his point was. What fear?

Sadly, most of them are: Wow, we seem to have a lot in common and you sound like an interesting person.

Which is fine. I guess. I don't write back to these much.

being female

Being female must be an advantage, given that I haven't actively pursued any men yet, 3 weeks into this whole adventure. I just keep getting emails, and "winks." I like the winks a lot, and have started winking back. Unfortunately, the people I've winked back at aren't emailing me! I don't know the social norms at all with this - I'm trying to figure that out - is it wrong to wink back? Is it too passive? Am I supposed to do the emailing? It makes winks a lot less exciting, if it puts the ball squarely in my court.

But winks to date: 32
Email to date: 12

Oh, and I winked at one person entirely of my own accord. That led to nothing. But I haven't even done a search since I first created my profile.

introduction

I've just started internet dating. And I want to write about it in a nice, anonymous way. Which really means ponder humanity in a not-nice way, but hopefully those being talked about won't find this. And I won't get in trouble. It's a possibility.